Purifying Our Conversations: A Call to Lift Each Other

Purifying Our Conversations: A Call to Lift Each Other

By Kateb Nuri-Alim Shunnar

There’s a quiet toxin in the air, and no, I’m not talking about smog or someone microwaving fish in the office break room. This particular toxin sneaks into our conversations hidden in snarky remarks, casual jabs, and the oh-so-subtle “just kidding” after a particularly cutting comment. Verbal pollution doesn’t just linger; it sticks to people like glitter at a craft party unwanted and impossible to shake off.

Words carry more power than we realize. They’re like verbal boomerangs what we throw out often finds its way back to us, though not always in the way we expect. If we hurl negativity, we can’t be too surprised when it comes flying back with extra velocity. Yet, how often do we stop to consider what we’re sending into the world? How often do we check if our words are building bridges or just burning them?

I remember sitting with my grandmother on her porch, watching the sun dip below the horizon. She had this habit of speaking in riddles that felt like puzzles I wasn’t smart enough to solve. That day, she said, “Words are like eggs: drop them, and you can’t scoop them back into the shell.” I nodded like I understood, but I was 12 and more worried about cracking open a soda than cracking the code of her wisdom. Years later, after some regrettable exchanges and several “why did I say that?” moments, I finally got it.

Negative speech is sneaky it disguises itself as “just being honest” or “telling it like it is.” It’s the snarky comment we justify because it gets a laugh or the critique we wrap in “constructive feedback” when it’s really just thinly veiled frustration. But let’s be real: when has “just being honest” ever started a productive conversation? It’s like saying, “No offense” right before you deeply offend someone.

At its core, verbal pollution often stems from the clutter in our own minds. We’re carrying stress, insecurities, and unspoken frustrations, and it spills out in our speech. It’s like having a messy kitchen you keep meaning to clean it, but instead, you just order takeout (or in this case, dish out negativity).

Imagine if we treated our words like spices in a dish. A little honesty? Perfect it adds flavor. A pinch of humor? Great it keeps things light. But too much bitterness? Well, now the whole thing’s inedible. We have to find balance, and that starts with being intentional.

I once had an argument with a friend that escalated quickly like popcorn in the microwave kind of quick. We were lobbing words back and forth when they suddenly stopped mid-sentence. I asked why, and they said, “Because I don’t want to be the one who ruins your day. You’re doing fine on your own.” Their humor diffused the tension, and I couldn’t help but laugh (even if it stung a little).

Words linger long after we speak them. They echo in the minds of those who hear them, shaping how they see themselves and the world. What a responsibility and what an opportunity.

So, how do we clean up this verbal pollution? First, take a moment to pause before you speak. Think of it as a quality control checkpoint would you serve this word salad to your grandmother? Second, remember that humor is a powerful tool, but it’s best used to uplift, not tear down. Finally, don’t be afraid to sprinkle in some kindness it’s the seasoning everyone secretly craves.

We also need to declutter the noise inside ourselves. If you wouldn’t let a raccoon run wild in your living room, don’t let unresolved negativity roam free in your thoughts. Tidy up with self-reflection, gratitude, or even a good laugh at your own expense (trust me, it’s humbling in the best way).

Let’s face it: no one’s perfect. We’re all going to have moments where we say the wrong thing or wish we could grab our words mid-air and shove them back in our mouths. But progress isn’t about perfection it’s about being a little better today than we were yesterday.

So, let’s commit to conversations that leave others feeling lighter, not heavier. Let’s be the kind of people whose words people remember for their warmth, not their sting. After all, the world’s already noisy enough why not make our voices a source of harmony instead of static?